getting what you want

Getting what you want is easier than you thought…

As children, there are many ways society and our parents condition us to manage our expectations.   We are told that likely we can’t have everything we want and we should be grateful for what we have.  I agree with this belief at its core.  However, I think we take this too far.  I think we are capable of manifesting what we desire most.

The keys to unlocking this door to our greatest desires are simple.  Not easy to practice at the beginning but like all great truths, breathtakingly simple.  The universe and the people in our lives are here to help us get what we want.  Our job is to ask for it, work for it and be ready to accept it when it arrives, even if it shows up in a different way than we expected.

Here is a simple guide from my experience and research to follow:

1) Know what you want and be specific.

  • We need to spend the time listening to our hearts and understanding what it is we want in a way that is specific and clear. It’s not good enough to be vague or to be timid.  Saying – I want to be rich does not provide the direction and clarity that is needed to manifest our desire.   Why… “Being rich” connotes a different amount of wealth for each of us.    Being rich does not give a sense of timing or clarity on the type of wealth we seek.  Here are some more specific examples
    1. I seek enough money to buy a new car by June of this year
    2. I want to earn $100,000 per year
    3. I want to have enough money to retire and keep by lifestyle by the time I am 55.
  • It may sound silly to be so specific and it may be hard to work on your desire to the point of this clarity as it creates for a sense of clarity and also accountability. However, it’s exactly these things – clarity and accountability that are needed for us to achieve our dreams.

2) Really start to get intimate with your desire. Spend time imagining and manifesting your desire.  Start by writing down or speaking out loud the desire.  Be aware of what feelings that generates in your body and what images come to your mind’s eye.  Be clear and be confident.  This is not the time for doubt.  This is the time to speak from your heart with confidence.   I act of committing your desire to paper or speaking it to someone else is so critical – it shines a light on your ambition in a way that activates you, your creativity and your capabilities.   Get in a habit of doing this at least 3 times a day.  You will find, that this repetition makes your desire take a sense of concreteness and achievability.    If you goal is to start your own business – spend time thinking about how much money you need to make, where will your business be housed, how many hours a week will you spend working on your business, how will you tell friends what it is you do, how will it feel when you secure work with clients, what type of clothes will you wear when you are running your business, and what will be scent be in your office.  Get clear on as many things as you can.   So, clear that when you close your eyes you can really “feel” yourself there, as if it is already true.

3) Once you know your desire, know it in a way that you can engage with it with all your senses and your mind and your heart, it time to take action. Make a plan.  Set a path to your desire.  Break down the big audacious thing you want into small steps you can take.  Sometimes these are things we need to do.  Often, they are also things we need to let go of.  For me, it’s always hard to accept what I have to let go of as I seek to achieve my dreams.  Don’t short circuit this.  Spend time, be honest with yourself and honour your feelings as you make your plans.  Be present with the choice of achieving your desire at the expense of letting go of something you cherish.  Take accountability for this choice and be at peace with the impact.  Everyone will have a different list, but I’ll go back to the goal of starting a business, since this was a major goal for me. Here was my list:

    • Decide on a name
      1. Come up with a few options
      2. Check for URL rights, email availability. etc.
      3.  Sit with a few names for a while and see which one feels right
    • Reach out to my network for advice
      1. Make a list of people to talk to
      2. Set up discussion guides to use in my meetings with my network so I don’t forget important things
      3. Commit to setting up two meetings per week with this resource list
    • Set up my website
      1. Talk to people I know and ask for referrals on website designers
      2. Lay out what content I want on my website
      3. Meet with potential suppliers
      4. Sign contract

As you can see, by breaking these things down into small steps it makes it possible for us to track our progress, hold ourselves accountable and celebrate our progress.

Getting what we want takes work.  It takes commitment.  It takes our willingness to expose our biggest dreams and desires.  To be willing to be held accountable for our dreams.  To be willing to lay out a plan and work with tenacity against the plan.   It is possible. It is amazing.  It is humbling.